TeaTimeSunday / SONNETS
Buffy, Dead/Evil Lesbians, Under God,
and Other Clichés of Life on Earth
as We Know It

rhetorical verse in Shakespearean sonnet form
(a 10-sonnet sequence)

NOTE: Although these sonnets are not a direct response to it,
they would not have been written if I had not read a "FAQ"
written with great care and passion on a matter of far more
cultural significance than I initially sensed. Here is the link:
DEAD LINK: The Lesbian FAQ (re The Dead/Evil Lesbian Cliché)
(NOTE: As usual the online comments linked to have been erased --
not because they are offensive, but just because corporations
"clean out" all "old" online conversation... as valueless.)


{TTS/070702_01.01} "ONE NATION, UNDER GOD," is a cliché.

{TTS/070702_01.02} And "showing up for work on time" is too.

{TTS/070702_01.03} And 99 percent... what Scoobies say...

{TTS/070702_01.04} And 99 point 9 of what they do ...

{TTS/070702_01.05} ... like ALL of television ... is "old hat."

{TTS/070702_01.06} A comf'rt'ble old rut WE UNDERSTAND.

{TTS/070702_01.07} Though "Mr. Ed" may morph to talking cat,

{TTS/070702_01.08} our comprehension modules are unmanned...

{TTS/070702_01.09} ... on automatic pilot... through the air

{TTS/070702_01.10} of common culture which is ALL clichés.

{TTS/070702_01.11} I HEAR CONTENTION:"Whoa, man, that's not fair!"

{TTS/070702_01.12} AND I REPLY: We "rewind" all our days.

{TTS/070702_01.13} The 9-11 terror "broke the mold."

{TTS/070702_01.14} A thousand times re-watching made it "old."


{TTS/070702_02.01} "Good Lord," I hear, "that is an awful leap

{TTS/070702_02.02} from weightless TV shows to solid death.

{TTS/070702_02.03} Real life... Real death... Real suffering... Too deep."

{TTS/070702_02.04} Before I go on, PAUSE, for clichéd breath.

{TTS/070702_02.05} (THINK: Count all those offended by that word?)

{TTS/070702_02.06} "Just take a deep breath," & you'll calm right down.

{TTS/070702_02.07} Is THAT "reality"... OR what you've heard

{TTS/070702_02.08} a thousand times before... Let's play the clown:

{TTS/070702_02.09} "Don't breathe... Just pinch your nose... |
and 'count to ten.'"

{TTS/070702_02.10} Oh, "bloody hell," "to ten?" ... How 'bout to nine?

{TTS/070702_02.11} Of course, you know 'twould be a "sodding" sin

{TTS/070702_02.12} against "the people" who "to ten" enshrine...

{TTS/070702_02.13} ...in "common knowledge"... as what is "correct."

{TTS/070702_02.14} (Like where verse accents fall, I recollect.)


{TTS/070702_03.01} If you're still looking for my point, you've missed

{TTS/070702_03.02} the point of this... which is the point... Confused?

{TTS/070702_03.03} Or was that misdirection?... Have you kissed

{TTS/070702_03.04} the photo of a star... become enthused ...

{TTS/070702_03.05} ...LIKE some guy in some movie showed you how?

{TTS/070702_03.06} How much of life is just REPLAYING parts

{TTS/070702_03.07} we've seen before?... Bart says, "Don't have a cow."

{TTS/070702_03.08} How many movie comedies have farts?

{TTS/070702_03.09} From Shrek to Scooby-Doo, man, farts are "cool."

{TTS/070702_03.10} IMPROPER SEGUEWAY to Joss Whedon's span

{TTS/070702_03.11} of cultural attention? ...TIME FOR SCHOOL:

{TTS/070702_03.12} Remember Joss is not a god... A man.

{TTS/070702_03.13} A man who has a job ARRANGING chunks

{TTS/070702_03.14} of pre-existing culture ... He slam dunks...


{TTS/070702_04.01} ... from time to time, as artists (sometimes) will.

{TTS/070702_04.02} But only those who do not comprehend

{TTS/070702_04.03} the nature of TV would think THAT skill

{TTS/070702_04.04} is pure creation... What we do is blend

{TTS/070702_04.05} ... well-chosen chunks of cliché-ridden life

{TTS/070702_04.06} and cliché-ridden art and history.

{TTS/070702_04.07} And in the choosing... making sure there's strife.

{TTS/070702_04.08} WITHOUT SOME CONFLICT ... Hey, folks, no TV.

{TTS/070702_04.09} NOW ASK YOURSELF: Do writers "know the score"

{TTS/070702_04.10} when all the chunks are added..."Good Lord," NO.

{TTS/070702_04.11} They CANNOT KNOW enough. (Joss won't be sore --

{TTS/070702_04.12} some have more time to think, while he must "GO!")

{TTS/070702_04.13} Yes, I can see where Joss's team "went wrong" ...

{TTS/070702_04.14} ... and caused gay women pain. (This will run long)


{TTS/070702_05.01} THE LESBIANS are right and wrong, of course.

{TTS/070702_05.02} A common human trait... But we're all screwed.

{TTS/070702_05.03} We think we act in freedom, "I'm no horse

{TTS/070702_05.04} with bit and bridle ... riding kids for food."

{TTS/070702_05.05} (But horses always think that. {smile}) |
... MOVING ON ...

{TTS/070702_05.06} ... before A.S.P.C.A. folks protest

{TTS/070702_05.07} my verses make good horses woebegone,

{TTS/070702_05.08} and they beat me until I have confessed. {grin}

{TTS/070702_05.09} OR maybe MOVING BACK to "Mr. Ed"

{TTS/070702_05.10} FAST FORWARD ... M.I.B.-2's talking pug.

{TTS/070702_05.11} Let's ask them both: "What could you've ever said

{TTS/070702_05.12} but cultural cliché or Pepsi plug...

{TTS/070702_05.13} ... to have an audience tune in your lines?

{TTS/070702_05.14} If they want "tens"... you cannot sell them "nines."


{TTS/070702_06.01} SIX SONNETS IN... When will this versing stop?

{TTS/070702_06.02} Especially since "nothing's" said so far.

{TTS/070702_06.03} Is this a Seinfeld sonnet... with no sop

{TTS/070702_06.04} of learning nor a hug -- as would be par...

{TTS/070702_06.05} ... for "simply entertainment" ... to distract

{TTS/070702_06.06} a thoughtless boredom ... seeking an escape?

{TTS/070702_06.07} No wish for provocation.... Why react?

{TTS/070702_06.08} We're couch-potato vegging... Eat a grape!

{TTS/070702_06.09} BUT TeaTimeSunday's no time to relax.

{TTS/070702_06.10} So shift your full attention into gear,

{TTS/070702_06.11} and pop your clutch, dear friends... Retread your facts...

{TTS/070702_06.12} ... reframe those thoughts that make you over-steer

{TTS/070702_06.13} ...before you round a curve... that blows your mind.

{TTS/070702_06.14} "Hey, Buffy.... Cut that out... 'you will go blind.'"


{TTS/070702_07.01} No, not the TV show... that is my dog. {ewg}

{TTS/070702_07.02} Of course, I named HIM that as one "cool" joke

{TTS/070702_07.03} Jump-starts a conversation in a bog...

{TTS/070702_07.04} They laugh when they see Buffy is a bloke.

{TTS/070702_07.05} How clever of me to have named him that.

{TTS/070702_07.06} "Is he a lesbian?" some always ask.

{TTS/070702_07.07} He's always licking Pussy, neighbor's cat. {innocent smile}

{TTS/070702_07.08} WHAT VILE PERVERSITY does this verse mask?!?

{TTS/070702_07.09} Come on now, friends, aren't artists FREE to speak?

{TTS/070702_07.10} Perhaps my provocation is "high art"

{TTS/070702_07.11} disguised as simple pandering ... to sneak

{TTS/070702_07.12} a high-falutin' message via fart.

{TTS/070702_07.13} This was to be the end... But where are we?

{TTS/070702_07.14} If we stopped now, what could we say we see?


{TTS/070702_08.01} AN ARTIST always works within constraints.

{TTS/070702_08.02} There's always trade-offs... money, time, or truth.

{TTS/070702_08.03} This is not Heaven... Artists are not saints.

{TTS/070702_08.04} You're often better paid to be uncouth.

{TTS/070702_08.05} "Uncouthness" is the tenor of our times.

{TTS/070702_08.06} Whatever that may mean... What it means now.

{TTS/070702_08.07} THIS WORD I've stumbled into with these rhymes

{TTS/070702_08.08} is one I'll now embrace as solemn vow.

{TTS/070702_08.09} "UNCOUTH" -- old meanings from the past, relink.

{TTS/070702_08.10} Archaic definitions: ... rare... unknown....

{TTS/070702_08.11} mysterious... uncanny ... makes you think.

{TTS/070702_08.12} UNCOUTH's not "comfy" like an ice-cream cone.

{TTS/070702_08.13} UNCOUTH is what true poetry should be.

{TTS/070702_08.14} But "poetry," Good Lord, is not for me....


{TTS/070702_09.01} ... 'Cause no one understands a poet's lines.

{TTS/070702_09.02} Although some profs pretend they can make sense

{TTS/070702_09.03} of truly unclichéd (poetic) signs.

{TTS/070702_09.04} No, I do not imply those profs are dense, ...

{TTS/070702_09.05} ... I'm saying we can say a lot of things

{TTS/070702_09.06} true poetry might mean... and miss it all.

{TTS/070702_09.07} A poem is not the way a culture sings.

{TTS/070702_09.08} Whatever it might say... few hear its call.

{TTS/070702_09.09} No, poetry on TV will not fly.

{TTS/070702_09.10} TV is for clichés... That is no crime.

{TTS/070702_09.11} Clichés are how we work... and love... and lie.

{TTS/070702_09.12} They make "fast sense" no matter how much grime...

{TTS/070702_09.13} ...from hand to hand transmission they've incurred.

{TTS/070702_09.14} On TV... what you say cannot be blurred.


{TTS/070702_10.01} TEN SONNETS?!? "Bloody hell," let's make this last.

{TTS/070702_10.02} Dear worshippers of TV-writers, please,

{TTS/070702_10.03} remember that your heroes have a blast

{TTS/070702_10.04} arranging words and images to tease...

{TTS/070702_10.05} ... their own enjoyment from the crevices

{TTS/070702_10.06} "reality" has somehow not filled in

{TTS/070702_10.07} completely with the grind of bus'nesses

{TTS/070702_10.08} that keep their cogs of people in a spin.

{TTS/070702_10.09} BUT they are rarely making something new.

{TTS/070702_10.10} THEY PLAY WITH PIECES that the culture knows.

{TTS/070702_10.11} Some tiny innovations... very few.

{TTS/070702_10.12} They play the tunes that ev'rybody knows.

{TTS/070702_10.13} But as times change, some songs should not be sung.

{TTS/070702_10.14} Dead/Evil Lesbians... That bell's "done" rung.

{ # # # forensicpoetry a/k/a BOKE

Copyright © 2002 Jim BOKE Tomlin artistofideas